You Know...
You know you're going to fail history class when:
-You wonder where you can get a recording of a horse whinning in fear to play whenever someone says your history teacher's name.
-You call the school to leave a frantic message on a teacher's inbox and almost call him 'Mr. Satan'.
-You have to change your desktop background to 'Waterlilies' because Michael Arden and Logan Marshall-Green kissing is too distracting for a Sunday evening.
-You realize that your cd collection really needs to be reorganized.
-You write amusing lists as opposed to actually doing something.
-You volunteer to read your little sister's spelling words aloud to her so she can practice... four times
-Waterlilies become too distracting. Solid black desktop it is.
-No music allowed. The notes are all pretty and stuff and hey, are your speakers fuzzing a little? Better disconnected them and fiddle for forty minutes.
-You have to turn off the little Microsoft Word help thing [Mother Nature, fuck that Paperclip] because you caught yourself staring at it for the third time today.
-Someone take the knife away from her please!
-You know, I don't think I've ever read a Star Trek/Newsies crossover. Maybe there's something to that...
-Sure Mom, I have time to help you bake all those cookies!
-You have more than ten reasons as to why you're about to fail history.
-Wow, what is under my bed, anyways? Maybe I should check.
-Your computer moniter suddenly needs cleaning. Maybe while you're at it you should get all the dust out of the CPU too.
-Speaking of moniter, you don't know anything about moniter lizards. Google them!
-The Hare Krishna mantra is playing on infinite loop in your mind.
-5ooo-7ooo word essay has 22o words and you've run out of things to say 6o words ago.
-Need 5-7 sources? Well, here's one... And didn't you just make it up?
-You've realized you're going to fail, panicked, then moved on and accepted that fact.
-Next order of buisness for you is changing your desktop back to Logan Marshall-Green and Michael Arden.
-You've had more cups of tea in the last half hour than the number of words you've written in the last half hour.
-The sentence: "Everyone who was not a priest or dead was a farmer" is possibly the funniest thing you've ever written.
-You are so far gone, you decided mow is a good time to try and learn how to use Photoshop. And hey, haven't you always wanted to speak Spaish?
-While you should be writing, you suddenly get the desire to know what fabric softener tastes like.
-You cheer when you realize that you picked up the wrong book: you've managed to use another source!
-Because you need four more webcomics to read every day...
-You briefly consider learning to drive so you can a) drive over and give Brendan a hug, b) drive away from your history problems and c) go get a smoothie.
-Dammmmmn. You really want a smoothie.
-You are now the 'ribbon ninja'. But for real this time.
-You have typed, incorrectly, 'Untied States' four times now. And this is the first time you've noticed.
-You have a Literature ISU to do too.
-You need more eighties grunge/metal on your computer now. Just so you can be proud and defiant. And slay the giant. As it were.
-You have been writing a list about reasons why you are going to fail history for technically longer than you have you assignment.
-Wow. Shark on man action. Honestly. You never thought you'd see the day....
-It is almost midnight and you are just getting down to buisness.
-You are Colleen.
Goodnight, and Good Luck.
-You wonder where you can get a recording of a horse whinning in fear to play whenever someone says your history teacher's name.
-You call the school to leave a frantic message on a teacher's inbox and almost call him 'Mr. Satan'.
-You have to change your desktop background to 'Waterlilies' because Michael Arden and Logan Marshall-Green kissing is too distracting for a Sunday evening.
-You realize that your cd collection really needs to be reorganized.
-You write amusing lists as opposed to actually doing something.
-You volunteer to read your little sister's spelling words aloud to her so she can practice... four times
-Waterlilies become too distracting. Solid black desktop it is.
-No music allowed. The notes are all pretty and stuff and hey, are your speakers fuzzing a little? Better disconnected them and fiddle for forty minutes.
-You have to turn off the little Microsoft Word help thing [Mother Nature, fuck that Paperclip] because you caught yourself staring at it for the third time today.
-Someone take the knife away from her please!
-You know, I don't think I've ever read a Star Trek/Newsies crossover. Maybe there's something to that...
-Sure Mom, I have time to help you bake all those cookies!
-You have more than ten reasons as to why you're about to fail history.
-Wow, what is under my bed, anyways? Maybe I should check.
-Your computer moniter suddenly needs cleaning. Maybe while you're at it you should get all the dust out of the CPU too.
-Speaking of moniter, you don't know anything about moniter lizards. Google them!
-The Hare Krishna mantra is playing on infinite loop in your mind.
-5ooo-7ooo word essay has 22o words and you've run out of things to say 6o words ago.
-Need 5-7 sources? Well, here's one... And didn't you just make it up?
-You've realized you're going to fail, panicked, then moved on and accepted that fact.
-Next order of buisness for you is changing your desktop back to Logan Marshall-Green and Michael Arden.
-You've had more cups of tea in the last half hour than the number of words you've written in the last half hour.
-The sentence: "Everyone who was not a priest or dead was a farmer" is possibly the funniest thing you've ever written.
-You are so far gone, you decided mow is a good time to try and learn how to use Photoshop. And hey, haven't you always wanted to speak Spaish?
-While you should be writing, you suddenly get the desire to know what fabric softener tastes like.
-You cheer when you realize that you picked up the wrong book: you've managed to use another source!
-Because you need four more webcomics to read every day...
-You briefly consider learning to drive so you can a) drive over and give Brendan a hug, b) drive away from your history problems and c) go get a smoothie.
-Dammmmmn. You really want a smoothie.
-You are now the 'ribbon ninja'. But for real this time.
-You have typed, incorrectly, 'Untied States' four times now. And this is the first time you've noticed.
-You have a Literature ISU to do too.
-You need more eighties grunge/metal on your computer now. Just so you can be proud and defiant. And slay the giant. As it were.
-You have been writing a list about reasons why you are going to fail history for technically longer than you have you assignment.
-Wow. Shark on man action. Honestly. You never thought you'd see the day....
-It is almost midnight and you are just getting down to buisness.
-You are Colleen.
Goodnight, and Good Luck.
