unavoidedcrisis: dalmatian resting its head on the arm of a couch (resting dalmatian)
Oh. Hey. My last journal entry was my 1,500th on this LJ. Go me.

Hello everyone. Let's talk about a thing.

So pets die, right? I deal with that a lot on account of I work at a vet clinic. PS, I don't think I'm building up to a certain point, I just need to pour out some words, so. Don't expect some sweeping, majestic summation of human existence at the end here.

There's a lot of different reasons as to why someone would have to get a pet put to sleep (PTS), but if the reason is bogus, my vets will send the person away with a live pet. They don't fuck around and take "well I just don't want it anymore" as an excuse. Reason number five hundred and sixteen that I love my job, right.

The vast, overwhelming majority of pets that are PTS at our clinic are PTS because they are very old and their bodies are shutting down on them. That's... a pretty damn good way to go, it turns out. Better than the ones we see that are young and suddenly horribly ill or injured. We get those sometimes, but it's far less regular.

My first PTS at this clinic (and my first working in the field, not a PTS that was one of my pets) was an old, sick cat who had had a great run and needed a little mercy. I was fine with this. The owner cried a little, thanked us profusely, and left with her equally crying toddler. It happened, I went "aw, that's too bad, poor family," and went about my business.

The second PTS was an ancient sheltie with an equally ancient man for an owner. He'd known this day was coming and was just so... At peace with it. We dragged a chair into the exam room so he could sit with her (we don't have chairs in there normally on account of very small exam rooms) and his adult daughter was with him. She was sobbing, he was just sitting quietly with his hand on the dog's paw. The daughter had to leave the room, asked if I would stand with him. I did, because how do you say no to a sobbing lady and a 5000 year old man who are asking for something so simple? You don't, that's how. I felt sad after this, but the old man hugged and thanked me when we took the dog's body away and I went on with my day.

(The aforementioned old cat's owner came by a few days later with a fruit basket. That happened. Blew my goddamn mind.)

I didn't know either of these families or their pets, this being my 1st/2nd week at the clinic, but I knew their pain and it made me frown and go "awww, bad day for them, I feel empathetic towards this situation, &c." This was also right around the time I had to put Casey to sleep.

We had a couple more, I don't really remember. A relatively young dog with pancreatitis that had been in every day for about 15 in a row for rechecks, fluid therapy, etc. had to be PTS in my first amount of time at the hospital. I knew the owners a little better (really nice old married couple) and I knew the dog. She was a real sweetie. They thanked us too, the whole team, and gave the vet who did the euth a hug and dropped off a card when they came back to pick up the dog's ashes.

But then Nash. Nash was a dog I had never met before who belonged with a family I'd never before. He was old and very sick and he had a peaceful death. And fuck did I ever cry. I got myself together relatively quickly, but in the 10 minutes I was crying, I was fucking sobbing.

There have been about 4 now that have had me in honest to god tears. And a few more past that were I've welled up a little, or had a Dean Winchester style "single manly tear." But I mean, the majority of them are "oh gosh, that poor cat/dog/hamster/family." There's a few more coming up, that we know are on the horizon that I know I'll cry over (including one for Sasha that's going to have me in tears for an hour, I guarantee it. Tonight or tomorrow. Very anxious about going to work soon :/), and a few more that I'll just be thankful have finally happened (again, Sasha. Ugh, poor creature).

On Friday, we had to euth a large Maine Coon (like McLovin and Casey...). The owner was a bedridden 89 year old woman and the cat came in with her daughter and HER daughter (so, daughter and grand-daughter to cat's owner, referred to henceforth as "lady" and "daughter" because I never met the actualfax owner). The cat was sick (suddenly, acutely, in a 8 year old cat, so still relatively young, though maybe closer to geriatric from a Maine Coon stance). Very sick. We did rads and a basic CBC to comfirm. Yes, the cat was very sick, Yes, the best thing we can do for the kitty now is have it PTS. So that's what the lady and her daughter did. They called the owner and she said goodbye over speakerphone in the exam room, then they paid the bill and left. They couldn't stay while it happened.

Some people find it really difficult to stay for any of it, and some people don't even want the pet to be taken to the treatment room to have the catheter put in because any time away from the pet is horrible for them to conceive (putting in an IV cath makes it way easier and less painful to put the euthynol in, less messy, less scary, less stressful. We put a cath in in the back, bring the pet back to the family and the vet gives them however much time they need before coming back in and doing the euth). I'm totally non-judgey of whatever someone chooses to do. I stay through every second of McLovin's euth last April and patted his stupid cat head. I was there for all of Casey's, but I could barely look at him, let alone touch him. Grief does weird things to us, every time.

They left, me and the tech stayed with the cat while the vet put the needle. It was good, tbh, that they left. The cat needed way more of the drug than we thought it would, had to IC after initial sedation. It was pretty bad to watch (but he didn't feel it, don't worry). I cried a little because it made me think of my stupid Maine Coons who decided both to die last year.

I'm covered in cat fur and dried tears now, it's 30 minutes after we close and we've been slammed all day, so I'm sweating like a cow. I've stripped off my scrub top, so I'm in my ratty old kennel tank and am washing blood from a very-enthusiastically-in-heat dog off the walls in the big exam room when someone starts rattling the front door. I am pissed, and exhausted (after being there 30 minutes late on top of my 13 hour shift already and it's been a goddamn long day).

It's the cat's people. The lady and her daughter. They brought us cupcakes.

So. I cried a little over the cat. I fucking sobbed over the cupcakes. Grief does weird things to people.

This has been a lot of thoughts about dead pets. I have to vent them out periodically so I don't explode.

Also, never give your dog his/her medication mixed with chocolate milk, that just makes you a fucking idiot.
unavoidedcrisis: dalmatian resting its head on the arm of a couch (resting dalmatian)

Mama is coming home soon and bringing me Wendy's. :)


Blood work on Caseycat came back this morning and it's not diabetes like we were hoping, it's end stage kidney failure, which means we're going to have him put down this weekend. The vet even said with the right meds and food combo, we could maaaaybe get 'til mid-January. It's just more humane to let him go before he starts to vomit blood.


I got the clinic job, I start Friday.

So, you know, extremely up and down day -- all of this happening while I was at the pet store (apparently the manager, says the other girls, does not like her employees having multiple jobs, so it remains to be seen if I'll be able to work both). I'm going to eat my Wendy's when Mama gets home and then ptfo. :)

Sick Cats!

Dec. 4th, 2012 05:51 pm
unavoidedcrisis: rainbow swoosh with the text "nyarrr" (nyarrr!)
Casey has been super off his food for the last few days -- wouldn't eat a single bite, but going crazy on the water.

Took him to see the vet tonight, they took some blood and got him some a/d recovery to eat. He's actually eating!

Also has a grade 2 to 3 murmur in his heart. Lovely. :|

Blood work will be back from the lab tomorrow, and we'll know what's up with him hopefully then. Major contenders are currently diabetes, hyperthyroidism, and kidney failure. Is it wrong to be super hoping for diabetes? It's the easiest to deal with. If he's in major kidney failure, we'll have to have him put down. WAH sick cats, what's up.

Had an interview at a vet clinic (not the one we took Casey to) Friday, they called me in for a working interview, which I had yesterday. I think it went okay? I will hopefully hear from them soon. I want a clinic job. :)

AND THEN the vet tonight that we did take Casey to asked me why I looked familiar, I said it was because I'd been in to there to drop off a resume. They took it from the rather impressive stack and put it on the top, plus he said he'd give it to his vet friend in the next town over who was specifically looking for someone with my credentials. #progress!

So there's an update about sick cats.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (Default)

You're welcome for washing the blood off my face.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (Default)
I had my semester one practical today and it went okay! The teacher was pretty impressed with his head, but of course, I was less than pleased. I can never seem to see the good in my own work (SHOCK, RIGHT).

Photos of Today's Exam )
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (omg dinosaur)
Walked around with the sweetest baby ball python at work today and I AM ACTUALLY IN LOVE. Did a lion cut on a little grey tabby today in grooming class and I AM ACTUALLY IN LOVE.

Shaving cats = damn good time. And omfg, seriously. Snakes. How much do I love them? It's not even a real number.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (puppy paws)
Some of my new friends from school )

Most of these pictures were taken while the power was out, and on my Blackberry, so they're all... not great pictures. Sorry dudes.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (sleepy dog)
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Could Never Take the Place of Your Man, by Prince. I just... I don't even know.

I was singing it today in Clinical while administering oral meds to my dog Lucy. I kept telling her she had some 'splainin' to do but I don't think she got it. Then I would start singing Prince again. I think she wanted me to shut up and give her more delicious pills (instead of just loading all our dogs up with various medicines, we were pilling them with dry kibble and water for the liquid syringes). I'm going to try and bring y'all a picture of Lucy tomorrow because she's one of my favourites and she's adoooorable.

Tonight, I have a bottle of wine called 'Relax' and it's fricking delicious. Except that I may have frozen it a little and now I have to wait for it to thaw out before I can have a second glass. OH THE HUMANITY.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (a big deal (castiel))
Reasons Life Is Not Awesome
- I did my math placement for the upgrading course I need to get into the 3 year wildlife program after my 1 year assistant program today. My math skills are somewhere between and grade four and five level! Fuck you, fractions, I was a merit scholar. You're making me look bad by being stupidly hard to add (but I know how to multiply you, so don't even pull that shit with me).

- I did not finish my [livejournal.com profile] polybigbang story like I wanted to.

- My apartment is messy and I need to clean it tonight.

- Lost my mp3 player.

- I had to put my arm in a tank full of sharks yesterday.

- Kennel duty Wednesday/Thursday.

Reasons Life Is Awesome
- I have people to help me with stupid math. People who want to help me, even. Not just people I have seduced/blackmailed.

- French toast and all its related deliciousness and adorable-ness.

- I was not murdered by sharks.

- While I didn't finish the story, I DID FINISH MY DRAFT FOR THE BIG BANG AND I'M GOING TO GET ART AND IT'S GOING TO BE AWESOME AND THREE PEOPLE HAVE ALREADY AGREED TO BETA IT AND I TOLD THEM NO BACKSIES (this is not like an engagement, Katie, I can call 'no backsies'). And I have the rest of the story outlined too, so it's just a matter of filling in blanks.

- Aced a test in Clin. today.

- Have grand and lovely plans to learn how to clicker train dogs. So. Exciting! Step one: buy clicker from work.

- Kennel duty Wednesday/Thursday.

KD is both not awesome and definitely awesome because while I am super stoked for being there and getting marked on my basic animal care, I am so not stoked for being up at 5 to do it. My Wednesday this week involves me being at the school from 5:30am to 9pm pretty much without a break. And then I'm up again at 5 on Thursday (though I should be home by noon and then I can sleep for 6 hours). So if I'm not around much this week it's because I'm there.
unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (lucky charms)
- Somehow, I found some old Twinnings tea adverts from like, '07, with Stephen Fry and Aldis Hodge and there was some giggling and hand flailing. McLovin didn't see what was such a big deal.

- Catching up on my terrible guilty pleasure show. Not even going to tell you what it is because it's all mine and I'm not sharing the absolute ridiculousness.

- Got my class schedule this morning. I have 9 classes in first semester. That just seems like a lot, right? It's not all bad. Only 17 hours a week and only 1 class on Mondays, Thursdays and Fridays. I have some pretty good weekends too. End at 9:30am on Fridays, start at 1:30pm on Mondays. So that's a half decent three-day-and-a-bit-weekend. Do not like 8am classes 4 days a week though.

- Multigrain cheerios are the frickin' best.

- I think I'm going to make a rec list of my favourite stories featuring my favourite thing to read about: banter. Banter rec list? Heck yes. I think it's a good idea. It will make me happy, at any rate.

- Getting curtains and stethoscope next week!


unavoidedcrisis: girl lying on the ground with playing cards scattered over her (Default)

December 2013

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